Boy and His Blob: Trouble on Blobolonia
Is…Is the title screen a riff on Indiana Jones? I like it! At first, I thought the jellybean idea was totally cool, and having the blob be independent and move on its own seemed awesome. Then the blob got stuck in the sewers. Three times. And I had to restart the game. Three times. I HATE POOR PATHING. *deep breaths* I’m calm now. I’m calm. Anyway… Couldn’t the whistle just have teleported him to me? That would have been nice. Both characters are so slidey, I can’t get them into position to get down that stupid manhole cover. At least that’s where I think I’m—no, wait. I’m supposed to create a hole he—and I’m dead. WILL YOU SHUT THAT MUSIC OFF? Really? If I don’t drop in just the right place I take falling damage? How am I supposed to know where to drop from? Luck? Trial and error? A guide? Bah. Bah, I say. I will return to this someday. When I’m good and drunk. (Also, that screenshot is the largest one I was able to find pretty much anywhere on the first page of Google. I'm lazy, okay?)
Blaster Master
Man, I love this music. The opening notes of that track… This feels like Mega Man meets Zelda meets Metroid. I suck at it, obviously, because I suck at all those games, but it’s still quite fun. Exploring around in the vehicle, then hopping out of Sophia the Third and doing some top down…slaughter. What? What did you expect me to say? Get your mind out of the gutter. (No, I’m not sure what else someone would say there, but whatever. My jokes don’t have to make sense.) Anyway, the sidescrolling part feels like a less-agile Metroid, while the top-down parts feel like Mega Man from a Zelda perspective. That’s cool—but I’m not entirely sure what my goal is. I explored every location in the first map, I think, and couldn’t figure out where to go. Now, I’m playing these games without help from the internet (as younger me would have had to), so this is pretty annoying. I think I’d need to recruit help to get past where I’m stuck. Actually, a lot of these games would be better with someone else playing along. I should find someone to do this with… Wait, that would require me to TALK TO PEOPLE. Meep.
Bubble Bobble
OMG, CUTE DINOSAURS AND BUBBLES. One hundred out of ten.
Next week: The Castlevanias! WHAT A HORRIBLE NIGHT TO HAVE A CURSE...
