Monday, December 22, 2014

Backlog Blitz: NES, Week 8, "My Faxanadu Fantasy"

Ugh. Finals are over. Thank Cthulhu. After finishing up all my papers, I spent last week alternating between sleep, work, and Assassin's Creed: Black Flag. It's the best pirate simulator ever. Anyway. I also crammed in some old games. So. Yeah. Here. Read my words. READ THEM. THEY SHALL BE A NEW MANIFESTO FOR AN AGE OF CONTEMPT. THE BLOOD OF ELVES SHALL BE SHED. IT WILL BE A SWORD AGE, A WOLF AGE, AN AGE OF LONG WINTER. 

That's a bit heavy for a blog about video games, isn't it?

Oh, man. Excitebike. It’s so…exciting! (Sorry. Not sorry.) I love the time-trials. It feels a lot like Trials HD, only much older. And I’m good at the first three or four courses. And having overdrive that overheats your bike is genius—having to balance boosting over long jumps and not overheating your engine is a great balancing act. The controls are great too, which is something not all side-scrolling racers can say. This is just classic Nintendo and tons of fun.

Oh goodie. Painfully slow text crawl. Enemies I can’t attack—because they’re too low and there’s no crouch attack—but I can’t jump over them either because the jumps are shorter and clunkier than a dwarf trying to dunk a basketball. Oh, and the music? IT’S HORRIBLE. ALLOW ME TO INSERT DRILLS INTO YOUR EARS. THAT’S WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE. 

Final Fantasy
OOOH. That opening text crawl. I like it. “The earth begins to rot…” I have chosen my party: Fighter, Black Belt, White Mage, Black Mage. Honestly, I kind of want to go all fighter… Wow. This is so much less clunky than Dragon Warrior. Interaction is actually context-based rather than hitting a button and selecting an action. While the combat is good, it’s rather slow for my tastes. I’ll return to this and its translated kin soon. 

NEXT WEEK: Gauntlet, Gauntlet 2, and a game about Gargoyles.